LIFE IS NOT ABOUT HOW MANY BREATHS YOU TAKE, BUT ABOUT HOW MANY MOMENTS TAKE YOUR BREATH AWAY

目前分類:笑話連篇 (15)

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很久以前看過英文版的, 朋友轉載中文版的, 還是讓我看了大笑起來。

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I can't stop laughing when I read the last paragraph!

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FREEZER BAGS: They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

PHOTOCOPIERS: These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again.

They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TIRES: Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated

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語文老師在講臺上朗讀了一首題為《臥春》的詩﹐要大家寫在筆記上。

 

《臥春》

暗梅幽聞花          臥枝傷恨底

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This truly is a real classic !!!

Envelope sent by LHDN (Inland Revenue Board)

 

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請越南勞工﹐   狗失蹤。

請孟加拉勞工﹐   馬來姑娘失蹤。

請小龍女﹐   老公失蹤。

叫警察查案﹐  證據失蹤。

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(11/07/2008, Friday)

剛才我很睏的時候﹐老闆的朋友進來公司找老闆﹐但是老闆還沒到﹐於是我請他坐下。

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I know your mouse.
我識你老鼠 !

You call me how to come out and walk in the future?
你叫我以後點出o黎行?

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A man was driving down the road and ran out of gas. Just at that moment, a bee flew in his window.

The bee said, 'What seems to be the problem?'

'I'm out of gas,' the man replied.

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(17/03/2008, Monday)

 

今天一大早我那損友SHIRLEY就打電話來說﹕「有個很好笑的笑話要告訴妳﹐但是妳聽了會哭。」

 

話說昨天去SAM 的彌月酒時﹐和SHIRLEY損友同桌﹐損友帶了她的印尼佣人同往。

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  • Oct 16 Tue 2007 20:55
  • JOKES

 

Q: Why men walk more

and women talk more?

A: Coz men have three legs

and women have four lips!

 

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The family is sitting at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?" The father, surprised, answers, "Well son, there's three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round & firm. In her thirties & forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions." "Onions?" "Yes, you see them, and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter says, "Mom, how many types of "willies" are there?" The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties & forties, it's like a birch tree, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."  "A Christmas tree??"

"Yes dear, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."

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May be I can explain to Chen in this way one day....


"Daddy, How did I come into this world?"


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To everyone who has children...or everyone who has had children...or anyone who has ever been a child themselves! (I guess that cover almost everyone, huh?)
Just for laugh, enjoy.....Specially to all the moms (and dads) out there ;)

Your Clothes

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Harry did like he always does, kissing his wife, crawling into bed and falling to sleep.

 


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